Ang Tunay na Kaibigan Parang Gamit...

Ang tunay na kaibigan parang gamit

Yung iba PAYONG,
panangga sa pangit
na panahon;

Yung iba RULER,
nagtutuwid ng
kabaluktutan;

Yung iba PAMBURA,
tumutulong makalimot
sa nakaraang ayaw balikan;

meron pang TSINELAS,
sinasalo lahat ng
bubog wag ka
lang masaktan.

di mo man makita
sarili mo sa mga yan,
may natitira pa—

KAHOY simple lang
pero atleast
walang kaplastikan.. :)

“ang pinakamasakit ay yung oras na, ngingiti ka nalang para hindi tumulo ang luha, at matulog para hindi ka nalang mag-isip. pero pag-gising mo sa umaga umiiyak ka parin”

BROKEN-HEARTED vs HEARTBREAKER

BROKEN-HEARTED: Ako yung nagiisang tao na nagmahal sayo ng sobra sobra at saten dalawa ikaw ang mas higit na nawalan. Dahil isang araw magmamahal ako ulit tulad ng pagmamahal ko sayo pero ikaw hindi mo na mararanasang mahalin ng tulad ng pagmamahal na ginawa ko!

HEART BREAKER: Hindi nga ako makakatagpo ng magmamahal saken ng sobra sobra tulad ng ginawa mo. Pero isa lang sinisigurado ko sayo, mamahalin ko siya sa paraang pinangarap mo na mahalin kita.

Broken Hearted Girl

Love of my Life

I won't go for someone who's always telling me how perfect I am coz am not. I'll find someone who will tell me exactly what he thinks of me. Someone who will tell me how irritating and impossible I can be. Someone who'll laugh at my clumsiness, but will still love me for it. Someone who won't be afraid of telling me the truth, coz only that one can be honest & loyal to me up to the very end. 

Two Hearts. Tear Hearts.

Two hearts have met in a dance. That moment was magical. There was a sweet song playing, there was harmony and soon love in the air. They fell in love and started building castles. In their dreams and promises forever with all certainty. But, somewhere, in the midst of the fun, they got lost in the dance, something went wrong, but they can never do anything. They were just drifting away, their fortress falling apart. There were so many questions, but no one had an answer. Then the music stopped and there was silence. When we truly loved someone, we give our best and let that person see the pureness of our intention. But sometimes, that person makes us cry and hurts us for the wrong reason. That someone must have loved us, but he has not loved us enough to make him stand for what he truly felt. Now, we are faced with the seemingly impossible task of forgetting. We have burdened ourselves long enough, but we still can't get out of this emotional trap. Let us remember that the more we try to forget someone we love the more painful letting go will become . Sometimes, we never had to take that person out of our hearts at all for he will always be there no matter how hard we try to drive him away. It ain't his presence that make this difficult. It is our stubbornness to accept our destiny that aligns forgetting next to impossible. We keep a cold face but deep in our hearts, there is still that lingering hope for reconciliation. Somehow, we still believe that we can rekindle small embers and relight the fire that once burned in our hearts. These thoughts give us hope but it also breed the seeds of loneliness and despair. The only way to forget is to accept and the only way to move on is to look ahead and let the footprints of the past be blown by the wind of time only then can our hearts find a partner in the dance of life and hopefully never get lost again...

Love, Fate, and Destiny.

A Story of Regret

There was this guy who believed very much in true love and decided to take his time to wait for his right girl to appear. He believed that there would definitely be someone special out there for him, but none came. 
Every year at Christmas, his ex-girlfriend would return from Vancouver to look him up. He was aware that she still held some hope of re-kindling the past romance with him. He did not wish to mislead her in any way. Hence, he would always get one of his girl friends to pose as his girlfriend whenever she came back. That went on for several years and every year, the guy would get a different girl to pose as his romantic interest. Therefore, whenever the ex-girlfriend came to visit him, she would be led into believing that it was all over between her and the guy.
The girl took all these rather well. She often tries to casually tease him about his different girlfriends, or so, as it seemed! In fact, the girl often weeps secretly whenever she sees him with another girl but she was too proud to admit it. Still, she returned every Christmas, hoping to re-kindle some form of romance. But each time, she returned to Vancouver feeling disappointed.
She finally decided that she could not play this game any longer. Therefore, she confronted him and professed that after all these years, he was still the only man that she had ever loved. Although the guy knew of her feelings for him, he was still taken aback and never expected her to react this way. He always thought that she would slowly forget about him over time and come to terms that it was all over between them. Although he was touched by her undying love for him and wanted so much to accept her again, he remembered why he rejected her in the first place - she was not the one he wanted. As a result, he hardened his heart and turned her down cruelly. Since then, the girl did not return from Vancouver for three years. They did not even write to each other. The guy went on with his life as he continues his search for his one true love. However somehow deep inside him, he knew that he misses the girl.
During the Christmas of 1995, he went to his friend's party alone.
"Hey, how come you are all alone this year? Where are all your girlfriends? What happened to that Vancouver babe who joins you every Christmas?", asked one of his friends.
He felt warm and comforted by his friend's queries about her but still he simply surged on. Then, he came upon one of his many girlfriends whom he once requested to pose as his girlfriend. He wanted so much to ignore her. It wasn’t because he was impolite but because at that moment, he just didn't feel comfortable with those girlfriends anymore. He felt that it was almost as if he was being judged by them. The girl saw him and shouted across the floor for him. Unable to avoid her, he went up to acknowledge her.
"Hi. How are you? Enjoying the party?" the girl asked.
"Sure. Yeah!", he replied.
She was slightly tipsy from the whiskey in her hand.
She continued, "Why? Don't you need someone to pose as your girlfriend this year?"
Then he answered, "No, there is no need for that anymore..."
He was interrupted before he can continue.
"Oh yes! You must have found a girlfriend! You haven't been searching for one for the past years, right?"
The guy looked up as if he has struck gold. His face beamed and he looked directly at the drunken girl.
He replied, "Yes. You are right! I haven't been looking for anyone for the past years."

With that, the guy darted across the floor and out of the door, leaving the lady in much bewilderment. He finally realized that he had already found his dream girl and she was the Vancouver girl all along! The drunken lady has said something that awoken that fact in him.
All along he had found his girl. That was why he did not bother to look further when he realized she was not coming back. It was not any specific girl he was seeking! It was perfection that he wanted, and yes... Perfection!

Relationship is something that both parties should work on. Realizing that he had let someone so important in his life get away, he decided to call her immediately. His whole mind was flooded with fears. He was afraid that she might have found someone new or no longer had the same feelings anymore. For once in his life, he felt the fear of losing someone.
As it was Christmas’s eve, the line was quite hard to get through. It was especially so for an overseas call. He tried again and again, never giving up. Finally, he got through at precisely twelve midnight. He confessed his love for her and the girl was moved to tears. It seemed that she never got over him! She was still waiting for him and never gave up even after so long.
He was so excited to meet her and to begin his new chapter of their lives. He decided to fly to Vancouver to join her. It was the happiest time of their lives! But their happiness was short-lived. Two days before he was supposed to fly to Vancouver, he received a call from her father. She had a head-on car collision with a drunken driver. She passed away after being in a coma for six hours.
The guy was devastated and was at a complete loss. Why did fate play such cruel games with him? He cursed the heavens for taking her away from him, denying even one last look at her! How cruel he cursed! How he damned the Gods! How he hated himself for taking so long to realize his mistake!! That was in 1996.
The moral of this story is :
Treasure what you have.
Time is too slow for those who wait;
Too swift for those who fear;
Too long for those who grief;
Too short for those who rejoice;
But for those who love...
Time is Eternity.

For all of you out there with someone special in your heart, cherish that person. Cherish every moment that you spend together with that special someone, for in life, anything can happen anytime. You may painfully regret only to realize that it is too late.

TRUST.

Sa TRUST, hindi puro advantages at benefits...
May disadvantages din.
Kala pag may trust, magandang relationship agad.

Pag sobra...
Magiging sobrang kampante siya at hindi mo alam, may iba na pala.

Pag kulang...
Masisira dahil walang relasyon ang kulang sa tiwala.
Dapat, tama lang. Yung alam niyo na, talagang kayong dalawa lang at wala ng iba.

Tandaan na lahat ng kulang at sobra ay nakakasama.

BANTAY.

(Repost)

“SIGE na Mommy, pumayag ka na please.”

“Okay. Just don’t be too late. Alam mo naman na delikado ang panahon ngayon,” paalala iyon ng Mommy ni Judith over the cellphone.

“I will, Mommy. Thank you po. Bye!” saka ipinasok ni Judith ang cellphone sa kanyang handbag.

Nakaramdam ng lungkot si Judith nang matapos ang kanilang pag-uusap ng kanyang Mommy. Sinabi kasi niya rito na may research work pa siyang dapat tapusin sa school kaya siya gagabihin. Subalit hindi iyon ang tunay niyang dahilan. Ang pagsisinungaling na iyon ang kanyang ikinalulungkot. Hindi kasi niya ugali na magsinungaling sa kanyang Mommy. Hindi iyon itinuro sa kanilang magkakapatid ng kanilang mga magulang. Lalo na ng kanyang yumaong ama. Galit na galit ito sa mga taong sinungaling.

Nasa unang taon na ng kolehiyo si Judith. Hanggang 6:00 p.m. lang ang kanyang pasok sa araw na iyon at may usapan sila ng kanyang boyfriend na si Joseph na susunduin siya nito sa waiting shed ng kanilang school sa Mandaluyong. Third ‘monthsary’ kasi nila ngayon at napagkasunduan nilang mag-celebrate.

Lihim pa rin kasi hanggang ngayon ang pakikipag-boyfriend niyang iyon sa kaniyang pamilya. Maituturing kasing makaluma ang pag-iisip ng kanyang mga magulang sa usapin ng pakikipagrelasyon. Para sa kanyang mga magulang, hangga’t nasa poder sila ng mga ito ay kailangang sundin nila ang patakarang makapagtapos ng pag-aaral bago ang pakikipagrelasyon.

Ang dalawang nakatatandang kapatid ni Judith ay matiwasay na nakapagtapos ng pag-aaral nang hindi nagkaroon ng anumang problema sa bagay na iyon. At aminado siya, wala siyang nalaman sa anumang pagkakataon na ang kapatid niyang lalaki at babae ay nagkaroon ng karelasyon habang nag-aaral pa ang mga ito. Kaya naman ganoon din ang kanyang ipinangako sa sariling gagawin.

Dangan lamang at dumating sa buhay niya si Joseph. Doon na nasira ang pangako niya sa sarili at sa mga magulang. First love niya ang lalaking bumihag ng kanyang puso. At head over heels siya sa pagmamahal dito.

“I’m sorry.. .na-late ako,” paumanhin ni Joseph nang makaharap niya ito.

“Okay lang, saantayo?” tanong ni Judith.

“Mag-dinner muna tayo. Okay na ba sa ‘yo sa Chowking?”

“Oo naman. Alam ko namang ‘yun ang favorite mong kainan. Halika na…”

Dalawang chicken lauriat with side order ng special halu-halo ang pinagsaluhan nilang dalawa sa kanilang ‘monthsary’. Bakas sa mukha ni Judith ang kasiyahan dahil going strong ang kanilang relasyon ni Joseph.

Nang makatapos silang kumain ay may iniabot sa kanya si Joseph.

“Pasensya kana d’yan. Yan ‘yung gusto mo,” nakangiting sabi nito. “Happy third month anniversary.”

“Thank you…Pero ang daya mo naman, e. Ikaw lang ang may gift ako wala kasi hindi mo sinabi kung ano ang gusto mo. Samantalang ako nabili mo itong gift para sa akin.”

Namalayan na lang ni Judith na hinawakan ni Joseph ang kanyang palad. Malambing napinisil iyon. Nang magtama ang kanilang paningin ay hindi niya mawari kung bakit kinabahan siya sa kanyang nabasa sa mga mata ng kasintahan.

Pilit niyang iwinaksi ang isiping iyon sa isipan. Subalit hindi magsisinungaling ang mga mata ni Joseph. Nababasa niya kung ano ang saloobin ng binata.

“Alam mo naman kung ano ang gusto kong regalo mula sa iyo,” seryosong banggit ni Joseph. “Anniversary naman natin.. .baka pwedeng ngayon na.. Judith.”

Bumilis ang pintig ng puso ni Judith. Hindi agad siya nakatugon sa kahilingan ng binata. Ni sa hinagap, hindi niya naisip na muli ay kukulitin siya ng kasintahan hinggil sa pagpayag niyang ipagkaloob na rito ang kanyang pagkababae, ngayon pa namang anibersaryo nila.

You ‘re so naive, Judith!

Mahal na mahal ni Judith ang kasintahan. Batid niyang hindi niya kakayanin kung sakaling magkakahiwalay sila ni Joseph dahil sa hindi niya pagpayag sa kagustuhan nito. Sa maikling panahon na mag-on sila, pinatunayan rin ng lalaki kung gaano siya kamahal nito. Ipinakita nito ang kabaitan, pagmamalasakit at pagbubuhos ng panahon sa kanya. Mga mahahalagang sangkap sa isang relasyon na sa tingin niya ay sapat na upang patunayan rito ang kanya ring lubos na pagmamahal maging ang kapalit noon ay ang pinaka-iingatang pagkababae.

“Salamat.. Judith,” ani Joseph habang magkadaop ang kanilang mga palad sa loob ng taxi.

“Love kasi kita e,” malambing na tugon ni Judith.

Ilang saglit pa ay pumapasok na ang taxi sa isang motel sa Sta. Mesa. Iginiya sila ng isang roomboy sa ikalawang palapag ng gusali sa direksyon ng kuwarto kung saan nila pagsasaluhan ang luwalhating dulot ng pagniniig.

Naroon pa rin sa dibdib ni Judith ang kaba ngunit ayaw niyang magpahalata sa kasintahan. Desidido na siyang tuparin ang ginawang desisyon kani-kanina lamang para kay Joseph.

“Nakup!.. .may nakalimutan ako,” anas ni Joseph bago pa man sila makapasok sa kuwarto.

“Sandali lang at may kukunin ako sa baba. Pumasok ka na sa loob, ha,” habilin nito sa kanya.

Atubili si Judith na pumasok sa loob. Aniya ay hihintayin na lang niya ang kasintahang makabalik at sabay na si lang papasok sa kuwarto.

Ganito pala ang hilsura ng motel. Ano kayang kukunin ni…

“Huh?!” gulat niyang wika nang mapansing may isang pusa sa kanyang tabi.

Binugaw niya ang pusa upang umalis subalit nanatiling naroon lang ang hayop at animo’y talagang pinagmamasdan siya.

Ano ba ‘tong pusang ito at kinikilabutan ako kung makatingin. Parang alam nito kung bakit ako narito. Sipain ko kaya ito para umalis.

Subalit bago pa naisagawa ni Judith ang balak ay naramdaman na lang niyang nagtayuan ang kanyang balahibo sa buong katawan.

Diyos ko! P-pusa namin ito…Hindi ako maaaring magkamali!

Kasunod noo’y ibayong sindak dahil nang matitigan niya ang mga mata ng pusa ay ang larawan ng kanyang yumaong ama ang kanyang nakita!

Nagpapalahaw sa takot na bumaba ng hagdan si Judith. Takang-takang lumapit si Joseph sa kanya.

“luwi mo na ako, please! Iuwi mo na ako.. .Joseph.. .hu hu hu!”

HINDI natuloy ang balak na mangyari ni Joseph. Subalit hindi rin iyon naging dahilan ng kanilang paghihiwalay. Sa maayos na paliwanagan ay nakumbinsi ni Judith ang kasintahan na ibibigay lamang nito ang kahilingan ng binata kung sila ay kasal na. At mangyayari lamang iyon kapag sila’y nakapagtapos na ng pag-aaral.

Ang pusang nakita ni Judith nang gabing iyon ay ang pusa nga nilang alaga ng kanyang yumaong ama Nang gabing iyon pala ay namatay din ang pusa dahil sa katandaan.

Sinarili na lamang ni Judith ang mga nangyari ng gabing iyon. Batid niyang sa pagmamahal sa kanya ng ama ay hindi siya nito hinayaang magkasala. At kahit sa pamamagitan ng alaga nitong pusa ay nagawa nitong iparating sa kanya ang mensahe ng pagmamahal nito sa kanya.

Memories... let go.

" I wish I could forget. " Katagang sinasabi natin kapag may mga bagay na ayaw na nating balikan o maalala pa. Mga alaalang masalimuot. Minsan kasi, kahit pa sabihing okay ka na at masaya ka na. Dumadating yung moment na may makita ka lang na ganito, ganyan... may marinig ka lang na ganon, ganyan... may maaalala at maaalala ka. Hindi man sinasadya pero kusang nagpapaalala. Hindi naman natin maiiwasan ang makalimot sa mga bagay na ayaw na nating maalala pa. Sino ba naman tayo di ba? Tao lang tayo. Sapat lang na naaalala natin ang mga nakalipas. Kasi kung hindi dahil sa mga masasalimuot na nakaraan, walang OKAY na tayo ngayon. Yon e kung okay ka na nga ba talaga. Kasi may mga taong kahit pa lumipas na ang 5 taon e hindi pa rin nakakaget over. Yon ang masama, nakakabaliw. Mas masaya ngang isipin o balikan ang nakalipas e. Kasi dun mo masasabing nagising ka sa isang bangungot. At magpasalamat kay Papa God kasi kahit pa sabihing naaalala mo ang nakalipas e at least wala ka na dun ngayon. Kaya dapat gamitin natin ang mga masasamang nakalipas para maging mas matatag tayo sa mga darating na panahon. E ano naman kung merong masamang nakaraan? E kung nakabuti naman sayo ngayon. Di ba? :") Ang katagang yan, nasasabi lang yan... Pero darating rin ang araw na marerealize mong thankful ka pa dahil nangyari yan.

Hindi naman talaga halata.

Okay. Ito ang dapat tinatandaan. :") Sa mga may kaaway jan, ngiti lang. Ngitian niyo lang sila. Mas lalo lang silang maaasar. <3

LONG DISTANCE.

Ang sarap basahin ng katagang ito, " Distance doesn't matter if two hearts are loyal to each other." Masarap basahin lalo na kung nangyayari palagi. Swerte ang magkarelasyong loyal sa isa't isa kahit pa sabihing 1 million steps ang agwat ng lugar nila.At malas naman kapag may naghihiwalay dahil sa LONG DISTANCE o ang pagkakalayo sa isa't isa. May mga taong faithful talaga sa mga mahal nila. Yung gumagawa ng ways para makacommunicate sa mga taong mahal nila. Na kahit pa sobrang busy sa ginagawa nila e hindi nakakalimot umalala sa mga mahal nila. Andyan din yung hindi siya tumitingin sa ibang babae/lalaki. Yun bang sa inaraw araw ng buhay niya e ikaw lang ang iniisip niya at nagpapangiti sa kanya... Yon ang sinasabing loyal sa isa't isa. Hindi kagaya ng iba. Magkahiwalay lang e may natipuhan ng iba. At ano daw ang dahilan? " Kasi wala ka e, siya yung andito. " Ano ba to? Dramahan? E kung ganon din lang ang tao sayo e hindi ka naman talaga siguro minahal. Pinagpalit ka na, ginago ka pa. Halimbawang nakapunta lang ng ibang bansa e ayaw na agad sayo? Pano nakakita daw ng maganda. Iniwan ka na, nilait ka pa. Ang sakit no? Kaya tayo, kung magmamahal tayo dapat yung loyal. Na kahit 3 taon pa kayong hindi magkita e kung may paraan naman para magkausap e loyal pa rin sayo. And you're both falling in love with each other over and over again. That is a wonderful love. <3

INTIYENDES?

"I am responsible for what I say. I am not responsible for what you understand." Minsan kasi may mga taong sabihan mo ng kung ano e OVER makareact. MAKITID ang utak, yon ang WORD. I admit that sometimes mali yung pagkakaintindi ko sa mga sinasabi sakin. Pero ngayon, marunong na akong umintindi kahit sa mga simpleng bagay. Iyon din ang gusto kong maovercome ng iba. Matuto tayong umintindi. Wag pairalin ang gusto ng utak kahit alam na mali. Pero kung alam mong nasa tama ka, well edi TAMA! Dun ka maging responsible... sa pagpapakitang tama ka. Pero kung mali, tanggapin. Hindi yung sambakol ang mukha sa galit at inis. Ngingiti naman. Tanggapin ang kung anomang sabihin sayo at matutong umintindi. ORYT? :)

Tao din ako.

Nakakainis lang talaga yung mga taong SNOB. Alam mo yon? Yung para bang hindi ka nila nakikita. Nakakainis no? Dapat sa mga taong ganyan lalong inaasar. (Haha) Mga may problema sa life. Kahit alam naman natin na lahat naman tayo may problema. Tama? "Tama". :") Well, marami na akong nakilalang mga taong snob. Yung iba talagang hindi namamansin, at yung iba naman hindi ka napansin kasi may ginagawa or wala sa sarili. (Baliw) Haha! Lalo na yung crush natin pag hindi tayo pinapansin, masasabi na lang na, "Hi, I exist." Tama ba? o tama talaga? Haha.

Flashbacks Hurts After Goodbye

Lahat tayo alam ko may nasabihan na ng "GOODBYE". Mga taong umaalis sa buhay natin, mga taong pumupunta ng ibang lugar, mga taong nalalayo sa atin, mga taong mahal natin na binawian na ng buhay, mga bagay na nasira na, mga alagang hayop na nawala na, mga taong naging bahagi ng buhay mo, at mga taong MINAHAL MO. Masasabi kong masakit ang magpaalam, pero mas masakit ang mga kasunod nito. Andyan yung pakiramdam na naaalala mo yung mga nakaraang magkasama kayo... masasayang alaala, masasayang usapan... tawanan, iyakan, at samahan. Minsan kapag magisa ka, naiisip mo yung mga bagay na ginagawa niyo dati. Yung mga pangako, yung mga kulitan, asaran... Lahat lahat ng mga alaala. Meron pang moment na pati mga naging away niyo dati naaalala mo tapos tinatawanan mo lang. Mapapangiti ka, pero bigla mong marerealize na wala na... wala nang mangyayaring ganon. Masakit na parang masasabi mo na lang na, "Sana hindi na lang nangyari." Masakit man pero kailangang tanggapin. Isang bagay na natutunan ko, hindi pa katapusan ng mundo. Kung may aalis man, may dadating ding bago. At sa bawat bagong dadating, at least marami ka nang natutunan... mga bagay na dapat iwasan at wag nang hayaang maulit pa.

A Beautiful Thing is never PERFECT.

God knows am not perfect, either. I've made tons of stupid mistakes, and later I regretted them. And I've done it over and over again, thousands of times... a cycle of hollow joy and vicious self-hatred. But even so, every time I learned something about myself.

♥ A BEAUTIFUL THING IS NEVER PERFECT

What is true happiness for me? Well, true happiness isn't based on having things you can buy, boys you adore, seeing Celebrities you admire, money you have... For me true happiness is when you are satisfied and you have someone you know you can count on. Someone who correct you when you're wrong, someone who can tell you " I don't like that ", "You look pathetic. " or simply, someone who can tell you honestly what is right and wrong. The one who is true to you. Someone who makes your day bright even for a simple smile. Someone who never fails to cheer you up. Someone you're happy to be with. Someone you want to see and talk to everyday. Someone you inspire and admire. Someone who can make you smile even you're at the lowest ebb.  That for me is TRUE HAPPINESS. That feeling happy though you don't have this, you don't have that. You're just simply happy. No worries. No stress. You'll wake up in the morning and sleep at night with a smile. In everything you do you keep on smiling. That is happiness... True happiness is a matter of experience. You cannot find true happiness on things.You yourself should find what true happiness is for you. Me? I found my true happiness from someone I call, "a very good friend".

Have you ever been in LOVE?

Have you ever been in love?  Horrible isn't it?  It makes you so vulnerable.  It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.  You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life.... You give them a piece of you.  They didn't ask for it.  They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life ain't your own anymore.  Love takes hostages.  It gets inside you.  It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart.  It hurts.  Not just in the imagination.  Not just in the mind.  It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain.  I hate love.